Dear Angels

Received this in the mail the other day from the Angels.

Dear Season Seat Holder:

We are happy to offer season seat holders the opportunity to purchase postseason tickets under the terms established by the Angels and Major League Baseball. Enclosed please find your 2007 Postseason Invoice and Postseason Terms & Conditions. Please make a note that your payment in full is due on or before August 31, 2007.

If you are currently carrying a credit balance on your account, then we have rolled over the appropriate amount necessary to cover any portion of your postseason payment. The credit is identified on your postseason invoice.

As a reminder, season seat holders may not sell and/or otherwise transfer event tickets without the express written consent of Angels Baseball, with the exception of sales and/or the transfer of tickets through the Angels Baseball ticketExchange system exclusively.

Dear Angels,

Maybe instead of trying to regulate free markets with your Hugo Chavez ideology, you should learn how to use a simple mail merge so you don't look like mongoloids sending out generic form letters to your fan base.

I'm sure you're well aware that secondary markets increase attendance, which results in higher revenue and profit in the form of merchandise sales, food sales, beer sales etc while providing liquidity. Angels Baseball ticketExchange is a pile of shit; I suggest you partner up with Stubhub like the rest of major league baseball.

Finally, maybe instead of worrying about what people do with goods they purchased and now own you should fix that little rat problem of yours - it's hurting my margins.

Very truly yours,

Your favorite scalper